Date sent:        Sun, 21 Apr 1996 15:16:40 -0400



How Does Parental Control Affect a Child?

There are many individual needs that teenagers look to receive from their parents as they
grow up. Some kids would  prefer to be restricted to what they are allowed to do. This might
include rules such as being in by 9p.m. on Friday nights, doing at least three hours of
homework a night, and maybe no dating till the age of sixteen. Other children who face these
rules might not agree with them, but the parent administering the rules might feel
satisfaction knowing these rules will only help the child. However, do these rules help the
child? Could the child rebel, and totally disregard these rules? Or, will the child succumb
to the rules, figuring these rules would only help them. Either way, the parents have the
authority of the household. This was an excellent example of how the parents can express
their parental control. The importance of parental control is seen through the eyes of the
parent. Every parent has their own way of raising their child. They all lay down their own
rules in order to get the child to grow as a mature, well taught person. The rules might
encourage responsibility,  working independently, or even learning to grow up on one's own
with unlimited freedom. In "The Outsiders", Jonny's parents didn't care what he did. Every
time he arrived home, there was always a fight going on. Jonny's parents were too busy
fighting with each other to worry about him. He was tired of his parents always yelling.
This hurt Jonny knowing they didn't care about him. He often wished he had someone like
Darry as a parent. Darry was young, but he had the right ideas of parenting. He always made
Pony do his home work to keep him on track for the future. Even though he enforced his rules
through yelling or through a friendly push, Darry always seemed to get his point across to
Ponyboy. At least Darry would care if Jonny got into trouble. Bob's parents on the other
hand, did care about his well-being. Bob's parents cared about him, they just didn't react
to punish Bob when he was in trouble. He would come home drunk, and his parents would blame
themselves for what he had done. They would even question their own parental skills, asking
"What did we do wrong?". Bob knew his parents blamed themselves, and he didn't like that. He
just wished his parents would learn to blame him for once. He was a child without
punishment. After a while, it took it's toll. Bob began to look for trouble by drinking and
picking fights with the greasers. It would only worsen the problem when his parents would
continue to fault themselves. By that time it was too late, and Bob ended up dead. Bob died
as a boy who never received a smack, was never yelled at, and was never the victim of harsh
rules laid down by his parents. All parents control their child in different ways, and that
was just the way Bob's parents did things. Is it safe to say that Bob would still be alive
if he was not pampered? Maybe if Bob's parents would have exercised parental control, things
would have turned out differently. Bob was looking for his parents to yell at him. He was
looking for his parents to set rules down for him, and take control of his young teenage
life. Maybe a simple curfew would have solved Bob's troubles. Sadly, those nights of
yelling, and the laying down of rules never came through Bob's house, simply because his
parents did not exercises the parental control Bob so desperately was looking for. For kids
to stay focused in life, whether it school, sports, or jobs, it is essential for the parents
of each family to lay down some guidelines for their child to follow. The rules will keep
the child out of trouble, and on the right track for the future. Lack of guidelines for the
child to follow, can result in problems similar to what Jonny and Bob encountered in "The
Outsiders". Parental control does not have to be looked upon as a set of dirty words. They
can only help.